God, Matthew McConaughey's so cool in that vid. Seems a little high, but hey. What's that got to do with todays edition? Nothing, absolutley nothing.
Anyway on we go.
I've read The Game, and I do enjoy occasionally perusing a few of the so-called seduction blogs.
My perspective on this, is that for the most part it's good.
David Deangelo's newsletters and eBooks have been some of the most influential things I have ever read in my life. Not ashamed of it.
My whole take on it is this, at a certain level what it represents is a good thing.
It's male self-help and if you're an intelligent guy, who just wants a little bit direction and realise how to present himself it's great.
On another level, if you go to bullshit sites like Thundercats seduction lair, which is basically the ''seduction communities'' gossip tabloid, you'll find unparalleled bullshit, terrible marketing, some awful snippets that are passed off as advice and bitchiness that would put Joan Collins to shame.
That kind of bullshit aside, I am reminded of the scene on Fight Club where Brad Pitt proclaims ''Here at Fight Club, we have some of the most intelligent men who ever lived.''
A few nights ago, I was reading a short work by acclaimed philosopher Alain De Boton, one of his short essays was on honesty and authenticity. He gave an example of a romantic dinner he was on with a young woman, and he was the archetypal ''nice-guy'' i.e. a bullshitter [or as the PUAs call them AFC's or chodes] basically changing his personality and beliefs in order to fit the womans. He mused that it wasn't possible for a man to be able to honest and authentic around an attractive woman and that it would be only by luck that a man should be able to hit her attraction-switches.
Although at first I almost cringed at this, but immediately thought of Mystery, of The Game by Neil Strauss and star of his very own VH-1 television show.
There's always a lot of controversy surrounding this guy, and a lot of it is outside the context of this article. Mystery however over the past ten-years with help worked out the major attraction switches.
The 3 main ones which are pre-selected by women, leader of men, and protector of loved ones.
And in fact over the years with help created a whole step by step system which is a compartmentalised version of the stages of a relationship. Based on his own research going out and getting rejected by hotties and Darwinian theory.
His whole system, is controversial amongst a lot of people for its use of pre-planned, scripted routines which some would argue are just manipulative and wrong.
But hey, If you're intelligent enough to use it...
Me personally, definitely prefer a more natural approach. I am a really big fan of RSD who at the moment are dealing in being more natural, self-actualisation, and all that you really need to be succesful is your natural self-esteem. I likes. Incidentally, in the book The Game, RSD are the guys who get the beatdown, and are made to look like manipulative, unethical slimebags.
Personally, I think the leader of RSD Tyler, is one of the most intelligent dudes I have ever come across. Now this is someone who in my estimation blows De Botoin who I mentioned earlier away. This is someone who gets it! His marketing and business plan is to say the least quite brilliant... to use his words he throws at you all of the free content and you're left in your own little buying temperature bubble frothing at the mouth.
Kind of reminds me of David D a couple of years back...
Anyway, these uber-smart RSD guys, seriously they're good, and I genuinely convinced they're some of the finest players in the world. Tim, Jeffy jlaix et al.
And they have another new resource...
and it is HAWT.
It's called RSDwiki and it's a useful, funny and cool wikipediaesque site that focuses on all things Real Social Dynamics.
I was reading some of the stuff, and the content was fucking fantastic. Here's a cool article:
“Yeah, I’m a bartender at _____.”
Any DHV can come off as nothing more than rubbish if you are calibrated about as well as a moldy gym sock. You, our hero of this story, know very well how to approach and talk to girls, and even get their loins burning for you. How do you hold onto that feeling, though? The answer, normally, is qualification.
There is a monster living underneath this bed, though, waiting for you to dangle your little stocking feet over the edge so he can snap them up in his claws and devour your testicles. This monster has three different kinds of claws, specifically, and they are Disclaimers, Excuses and Statements of Expertise.
“Well, I could be wrong, but…” Disclaimer!!! “I don’t know much about ____ however…” EXCUSES!!! “Well I ___________ so my suggestion is ________” EXPERTISE!! CHOOODE!!
Chomp, chomp, chomp. Bye bye lefty and righty.
DROP QUALIFYING STATEMENTS.
Why state that you could be wrong? Of COURSE you could be wrong, no one is infallible.
This is useless drivel that you are spitting out to cover your ass in case someone calls you out. SO!?
Put yourself out there, put your personality on the line, and make BOLD ABSOLUTE STATEMENTS. No, I don’t mean make blanket statements and come off as some kind of bigot, I mean stand behind your words and say them with conviction and purpose.
Statements of Expertise? BULL SHIT, MATE! Pure desperation trying to qualify yourself in their eyes. You are telling them WHY your opinion matters.
CHOOODE! Chomp Chomp. Adios, juevos.
If you want them to think your opinion matters speak every word that leaves your ruby lips with the conviction of Moses handing the 10 commandments down to the Hebrews. Speak with the reverberating tonality of the grand high lord of the universe! Worry not about their reaction, put the whole of your life energy behind your words!
If you want to talk about your previous experiences that have given you these insights, AWESOME vibe on it, talk about it, convo about it, but DON’T use it as some kind of chode qualifying statement to lend weight to your own weak words.
You are our hero! Why are you so afraid? Are you afraid of being called out, of being WRONG? Make your statement, make your mark. Press your feet into the sand of life, slam your face into that brick wall. Might it hurt? Surely. If you get called out, take it like a man. Respect. No one expects you to be the answer man. It is also not your job to convince people you are correct.
“So, are you adventurous?” “Yeah!” “You know what I love about you? You’re adventurous.”
It’s formulaic. You set up a standard, she meets it, you qualify her on it, and then you pick her up and carry her into the bathroom where you rip her skirt off with your teeth and bury your love sausage deep in her warm hot-dog-bun of passion. Well, not quite, but the general idea behind this kind of Direct Qualifying is two fold. Mainly, you are trying to convey the fact that you want her for more than her succulent mounds of supple delicious breast, whether or not this is true. The nice side effect is that you are trying to encourage certain behaviors to assist in your escalation, like being adventurous.
It works, for sure. In my opinion, though, this is weak. This baseline type of qualification should certainly be in your toolbox, you should certainly use it to drill many holes, hammer the rest, and get your saw on. You want more though. You want the POWER TOOLS. Screw this hand crank drill, forget this little rubber mallet, and get the fuck rid of your back and forth Neanderthal saw that you don’t even cut shit with anymore you just use it to play crazy woosey music when you are drunk in the garage. Don’t even talk like you have no clue what I’m talking about.
YOU want the power tools. You want the 250hp gas powered turbine drill, you want the 100Gpa rivet gun, you want the titanium reciprocating Saw’z-All of DOOM. You want True Qualifying; Expression of Quality.
I take issue with direct qualifying in that it inherently turns into nothing more than you complimenting her character. Yeah, this is all well and good, but WORDS ARE WEAK, MAN. Just like I discussed above, you can spit your expertise till you are blue in the face and people might or might not give two shits about anything you have to say. However, when you speak with conviction and purpose, people are FORCED to listen regardless of whether or not you have any clue about what you are saying. Same thing here, talking about your expertise has its place (convo) and direct qualifying like this has its place (vibing.)
So, JD, you ask, our hero… how do I go about Expression of Quality?
Two simple steps, first you express yours then you ACCEPT her expression. Well ok I made that sound simpler than it really is, but I promise you, by the end of this article you will totally get it.
Essentially, you are qualifying yourself THROUGH YOUR EXPRESSION, through your conviction, your personality… YOUR VALUE. This is the ESSENCE of BEING HIGH VALUE! This is the kind of core value that transcends social value (like having a BMW or being a bartender.) Just like there are two kinds of Direct Qualifying, there are two kinds of Qualification of Expression.
The first, obviously, is qualification of your own expression. This is a summation of your body language, your tonality, your personality, and your overall value. SWEAT FIVE TONS OF VALUE every step you take. This is like screaming “I am a fuckworthy guy!” on the subliminal level and having it WORK. This is what sets you up as a high value individual, one who is respected and desired. Combine this with your normal well placed DHV’s and you are going to have a Midas Cock, everything you poke with your man-bat will turn to gold before your eyes.
The next step; accept her expression of quality. In any interaction, people are going to be expressing their HUMAN QUALITY. This is SO important for a girl to actually FEEL qualified. You can tell her how much you love her for being ‘fun’ but it means only steaming piles of donkey shit unless she actually FEELS QUALIFIED.
Here’s the scene: You are non-stop expressing your HUMAN QUALITY; you are oozing shit tons of value every time you drip a bead of sweat. People are hanging on to your words, you are stadium story telling to half the bar, in fact some guy over in the corner just grabbed one of your cigarette butts to try and sell on eBay. You are the VALUE MASTER, and you’ve spotted this super fine girl who is half Taiwanese and half Argentine while simultaneously fending off the other chode girls in the bar trying to snip a lock of your flowing glorious mane of hair so they can make a love-voodoo doll. This smooth caramel colored girlie is about 5’4” with gravity defying C cups, hair softer than silk, lips that could suck the soda out of an unopened can and an ass you can bounce a quarter off of. She is very used to always being the center of attention, but you’ve been Lording the bar since you set foot in the door and got up to the plate to Karaoke your way into the celestial palace of love on a glowing nimbus built from Styx’s “Blue Collar Man.”
“I'll take those long nights, impossible odds Keeping my eye to the keyhole…”
You glide to little Caramel on a cushion of air, and spit your line.
Suddenly, little Caramel is feeling this strange pang in her little fem-gut. That pang is what we call BEING AN OBJECT. You know you are the man; she knows you are the man, but she feels a twinge of NORMALCY. She feels like she is not worthy of your attention. She is recoiling, and begins to feel objectified. She starts to feel like YOU JUST WANT HER FOR SEX. You sense the shit tests on your PUA-dar… two bogeys, incoming at 5 o’clock!! You must cut them off!
WHAT DO YOU DO, Lord of the bar?! Your neurons fire ablaze as RSD fueled serotonin floods your synapses with the nectar of the Gods. Harder, better, faster, stronger, you are a machine, and the little monkeys on typewriters buried deep in your subconscious hammer away at the files of reference experiences in mere nanoseconds to dredge up an auto-response to your plight. You dog, you. You move into Qualifying.
More or less, the PURPOSE of your words are as follows: “So, tell me. Are you fun/can cook/insert random standard?” “Yeah…” “Awesome, I love you because you are ______.” “Thanks.”
Bombs away! You are now in qualifying!! What’s this? You are stalling! What is happening? The LORD is losing altitude. THE NIMBUS IS CRASHING!!
Stop, rewind. Take a page from Alexander, from Tim, Jeffy, Tyler, you name it. Call up your inner Manwhore. YOU HAVE TO ESCALATE.
This abstract concept is the stuff of legends; escalation is qualifying! Have you ever sat, alone in your dark den of chodiness, and contemplated the essence of the CLAW? Why does it work so well, and have the little girlies staring at you wide eyed, expectant, ready to receive whatever you so choose to bestow unto them?
The answer is the 1-2 punch of Escalation and Qualifying. The Claw expresses your entire purpose as a living being in one motion; your dominance comes out, and she feels qualified to be CHOSEN by you. She is under your wing, in your reality, and all because she is WORTH IT.
Another day in the life of our hero… You managed to save the day and cut your losses on your crash and burn with Caramel, and left the club with her phone number. You ring her up and set up the date at that sweet coffee shop you talked about, you know, the one that has those orgasmic pastries slathered in creamy cinnamon and sugar glaze, mated deliciously with all that rich dark scrumptious imported Brazilian coffee? But first, a surprise! And she only gets to see it today, so she has to come or she misses it! What fortune! You bring her to a playground at a local elementary school before the coffee house, swing on the swings, play Marco Polo on the jungle gym and get your kino on like a river of passion. At one point, your faces are near, the energy is high, her eyes are wide and glistening…
….AND YOU CHODE OUT. You don’t kiss her. She goes slightly cold, but remains friendly. You backwards rationalize it saying that you ‘didn’t want to go too fast and ruin the pull.’ BULLSHIT, MATE!! She gets slightly colder, but remains friendly, albeit no longer reciprocating your physicality with the same fervor.
You arrive at the coffee shop, laden with the smoke of Clove cigarettes hanging in the air like an herbal fog of cancer. You can smell the beatniks’ musk of artistry set against the simmering scent of ripe coffee beans steeping into little paper cups behind the cute 18-year-old blonde barista, blue eyes peeking out from behind her thick-rimmed now-in-fashion glasses. Caramel’s rear looks firmer and rounder than ever in her jeans as she wiggles to the counter in front of you to order her late. YOU JUST WANNA SMACK IT.
Throughout the evening you try to re-escalate, but are running up against a wall. You are being needy and reaction seeking, the whole time being inside your head and thinking, “I have to get her back!” She senses it and you sink farther and farther into the Friend Zone.
The moral of this Day Two is NOT that missed opportunities cannot be recovered, so if you are thinking this is the point I am driving home you are both sorely mistaken and, as I assumed, relatively blind to the BLATANT PHYSICAL DISQUALIFICATION you wrought on this poor girl’s soul!
Know this and know this now… if you already have attraction from a girl, escalation will qualify her. Read: do NOT be needy, do NOT be a horny chodeling, and do NOT under any circumstance REFUSE TO ESCALATE. Push-pull is fine, but you gotta have the PULL!!! You got to the point with Caramel where she was presenting her quality to you; you guys were vibing, having massive amounts of fun, building insane attraction, with a small spice of pair bonding. You were going to kiss her, and you didn’t. At that point, she thinks, why? Yes, sometimes you CAN recover, because she will wish to re-gain her favor in your eyes, but other times if you come back at it as you did in the coffee shop here, you will come off as needy and wanting her for nothing more than sex despite how many standards you qualify her on.
Enough of the “do- not’s” it’s time for some “do’s.”
Escalate, all the time. Always be closing, take a step higher and a step higher. If you have to ask, “Should I do ____?” the answer is always YES. PLOW. She is expecting you to do it, she sure as hell is not going to do it for you. Reward her with your touch. When you are doing role-plays, touch her on the high notes, and push her on the low notes. When she does something you approve of, qualify it with words AND kino. Seems like a basic principle, I’m sure, but it is too often discounted that failure in this area can be a complete disqualifier!
Finally, one fateful day, you’ve pulled Caramel back to your apartment to show her your exotic fish tank full of wonders from the time you went snorkeling off the coast of Bangladesh. Go you, you and your bowl of Sea Monkeys. Nevertheless, she is on your bed in your room, and you make your moves.
WHAM. LMR wall. Face first, nose on the bricks, blood. You taste the salty sting in your mouth and have two options: Plow or Chode Out. Much to your dismay, you chode out. You fail to recognize her LMR as token resistance:
You reach for her pants “nooo not today!” “Ok.” As you trail off into the friend zone….
You asshat, haven’t you learned a thing!?
”Excuse me? We’re not having sex. Show me your panties babe, they look sexy." ”Haha, okay” as she reveals the lacy trim of her tiny black thong strapped around her 41” arse You play with it, MMmmm wow you cannot resist her, and rub her through her underwear, the whole time maintaining, “We are not having sex.”
Until eventually, wouldn’t ya know it, you are slamming her shoulder deep in the sheetrock from behind with her screaming, speaking in tongues, some kind of Demonic language, as your cock is devoured by the angels turned devils inside her walls of love. You pull out and do your best to make a Jackson Pollock all over the dimples on her lower back, hmmmm, maybe she should get a tattoo here.
Oh, Our Hero, you did it! You have successfully shattered the oppressive walls of our society that condemn women to torture inside of an impossible double standard. Her entire life she has had to live under the judgment of the lens of the world; is she a slut? Does she have too much sex? If not, then she is likely to be a prude! Incapable of love with a man! Oh, woe is she, what is a girl to do? Put out and be a slut, or keep it and get no love. Up strides you, our knight in shining armor, to liberate her from these shackles of repressed sexuality.
Had you not freed her from these bonds, and continued to chode out and not pushed past the token resistance, guaranteed next time you would be hard pressed to attain the same level or push past it. Do-able? Sure. Advisable? Never. You had value, you had a strong vibe, you had a good connection, and you escalated all the way through the interaction to the bedroom. Not only does choding out there disqualify you as a fuckworthy man, but also it completely disqualifies HER as being WORTHY. Qualifier her with your dick.
So, you have been enlightened. You have read through this missive, and you have mentally banged this very fine chica I have described to you despite some chode-lapses.
What I want you to take away from this post, in order of internalization:
1. If you simply walk up and start interviewing a girl, as in asking her questions, she is predisposed to wonder why you give a shit what her opinion is. This is why I believe opinion openers are weak if you do not recognize them merely as an indirect opening strategy and follow them up with strong game. If you do not GIVE HER A CHANCE to establish her WORTH (qualify herself) the only thing she can pinpoint that makes you desire her is the way she looks and her sex. So, go into an interaction giving value by making comments, relating a story, and projecting fun positive energy.
2. Setting up standards and qualifying a girl on them works fine, but you must understand the deeper essence of Qualification Game to really make it work to your best advantage.
3. Understand that you need to mix all aspects of your game into every action. Each thing you say/do should escalate and qualify at the same time. The Claw is a perfect example of this, as is physical push/pull during role-playing. Start the kino right at the start of the interaction, and pace it through the interaction. The pace you set is what determines her qualification; bathroom pulls of glory happen when you break a girl’s chains as described above very quickly, often times these bonds will take longer to free before you become more and more intimate with the dynamic.
4. Do not be afraid to push the interaction as far as you can push it, because she is expecting you to show her that this is OKAY in your reality. It is horribly unfair the double standard that has been created for women in today’s society, that they cannot connect with their sexual urges and desires without being labeled negatively. Allowing them to qualify themselves to you by expressing their quality, and accepting this expression, will let them see for themselves on a subconscious level their human worth. A slut is a girl who has no worth and is having that sex, however if a girl has expressed her value then being sexual is simply recognizing her desires.
Set women free.
Cheers
-JD
Yes. Beautifully put.These RSD guys are the shit.
On the life update side I went to pick up The Myth Of Sisyphus today, and waited for what seemed like an eternity for the woman to find it. If it was any other book, I may have been frustrated, but I felt I just had to laugh at the irony; considering the books subject matter.
I worked tonight, pretty dull time.. I saw the magical Christine who told me she'd been kicked out of her house.
Smashing. Just smashing.
Commonalities are great for rapport building!
I see a future of love and big issues.
Be good.
-Michael
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